11 Reasons the Return of Mandatory Masks in Casinos is Awesome

The mandatory mask mandate is back in Las Vegas as of midnight on Thursday, July 29, 2021 (technically, 12:01 a.m. on July 30).

Masks will be required indoors whether one’s vaccinated or not (unless smoking, eating or drinking), and that includes casinos.

Thankfully, the fun doesn’t need to stop. Vegas has a lot of booze.

Rather than rant, we’ve decided to focus on the bright side of this unfortunte turn of events.

Here, then, are 11 reasons the return of masks to casinos is awesome. Just play along.

1. Masks Muffle Loud-Talkers

Loud-talkers are everywhere, and the prevalence of liquor in casinos only serves to make things worse. Enter masks. They not only serve to muffle loud-talkers, they also solve the issue of people who spit when they close-talk. Masks are god’s gift to the neurotic and we’re so glad they’re back.

2. Masks Mean Less Smiling Required

With masks, there’s much less pressure to smile. This is true for everyone, but it’s especially welcomed by casino employees whose job duties include pretending you’re funny and likeable. Most employees have perfected “smizing,” or smiling with their eyes, but masks still provide some effective camouflage. It’s worth noting masks make us focus on the eyes. It’s a well-known fact prolonged eye contact creates a sense of affinity, and affinity with, say, a bartender, often results in stronger pours. Masks for the win!

Here we go again.

3. Masks Filter Cigarette Smoke Stench

Casinos are popular with smokers, but cigarette smoke can be irksome to some guests. Masks do a decent job of filtering out the smell of cigarettes. At certain times, even when the mask mandates were dropped, we sort of wished we had one on. Side note: If you really dislike cigarette smoke, visit Park MGM. It’s smoke-free.

4. Masks Help Service Workers Talk About Us

Many casino, restaurant and bar customers turned into jerks during the pandemic. Folks in the service industry have no real way to fight back other than to talk shit about us. It’s so much easier to do that when we can’t see their lips! Service industry employees being able to discreetly trash-talk rude customers without being detected is a great perk of masks.

5. Masks Provide Cover for Unattractive People

Masks have been a godsend for those of us who are appearance-challenged, and we were a little disappointed when they went away for a minute. Masks even the playing field, and are especially beneficial to those with poor dental hygiene. Visitors from Southern States can again walk among us without shame, and we can’t wait to see our friends from the U.K. again. Please don’t send us angry e-mails. We kid because we love.

6. Masks Save Money

It’s pretty much common knowledge women saved a fortune on lipstick during the previous mask mandates. The savings mount when you consider the decreased need for breath mints toothpaste and shaving cream. The return of masks is a windfall, except for attractive women who rely on their looks to get free drinks in nightclubs. Poor them.

7. Masks Replace Black Out Curtains

Yes, most Las Vegas hotels have black out curtains, but they’re moot because masks can easily double as sleep masks. You’re welcome.

8. Masks Make Inexpensive Keepsakes

Forget keychains and fridge magnets, casino-branded masks make fun, inexpensive souvenirs. Visit the gift shop at your favorite Las Vegas casino for details. If you ask nicely, they might just give you one for free. Free advertising!

Bonus: Branded masks are a handy reminder of where your hangovers originated.

9. Masks Keep the Mask Industry Afloat

The mask manufacturing industry had a little freak-out when masks went away, but now they’ll be raking it in again. (Mask sales rose 24 percent leading up to the mandate being reinstated.) Mask-makers and retailers have bills to pay, just like the rest of us, and masks won’t be a thing forever. Probably.

10. Masks Give Us All Something to Talk About

Small talk is king in casinos, and everyone’s pretty much over talking about sports and the weather. Now, we have masks to spark conversation again. Masks are a gateway to passionate
discussions about a wide variety of topics including health, viral loads, politics, public policy and what morons people who don’t agree with us are.

Our thoughts go out to all the casino employees who have to cover up their moneymakers.

11. Um, Hello, Heists

Back in the day, masks were a big no-no in casinos, but now they’re mandated! If you’re planning to rob the vault shared by Bellagio, Mirage and MGM Grand, which definitely exists, you’re going to want to protect your identity. With a mask, your caper will be flawless and you’ll be able to escape with your anonymity intact. One more thing: You may want to hold onto your mask, as we understand there are a lot of close-talkers in federal prison.

We hope this list has helped you see the glass-half-full side of our exciting new mask mandate.

While the reinstated mandate is frustrating, we urge you to remember the folks enforcing it didn’t sign up to pester you about keeping your mask on. They’re not thrilled about the mandate, either, but they didn’t make the policy, so chill.

Outdoors. No mask required.

If we want to visit casinos, and we do, we need to mask up and be nice to each other.

If you’d prefer to not wear a mask, visit one of the outdoor attractions in or near Las Vegas, like Red Rock Canyon or Fremont Street Experience. Hit the pool. Rent a convertible and cruise The Strip.

Otherwise, masks are a thing again.

Remember, you don’t have to wear a mask when you’re drinking, so ABD (always be drinking). You’re welcome, again.

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Rumor: Snoop Dogg, Martha Stewart Restaurant Slated for Paris Las Vegas

Hot on the heels of our rumor being confirmed the Laurel Lounge at Paris will be replaced by a Vanderpump lounge, we’ve got more exclusive scoopizzle. Which isn’t a thing yet, but should be.

We hear none other than Snoop Dogg and Martha Stewart will bring a new restaurant concept to Paris, an idea so crazy, it just might work.

Actually, it’s not that crazy given the fact Dogg and Stewart have been BFFs for some time now.

This odd couple has sizzle, which we’d add “izzle” to, but it would be weird.

Snoop Dogg met Martha Stewart when he appeared on “The Martha Stewart Show” in 2008.

The pair had a TV series on VH1, “Martha & Snoop’s Potluck Dinner Party,” with a spinoff series, “Potluck Party Challenge.” Emphasis on “pot,” in case that weren’t immediately evident.

An official announcement of the joint (yeah, we said it) project is pending, but we would like to give our official stamp of approval for whatever Snoop Dogg and Martha Stewart have in mind for Paris.

While details of the restaurant aren’t available yet, we hear there are already plans in the works for other locations.

Hey, Snoop, while weed is legal in Las Vegas, you can’t smoke it in casinos. Just a heads up.

It’s unknown which existing venue the Snoop Dogg and Martha Stewart restaurant (and, we trust, lounge) may displace. We’ve heard it will move into the space currently occupied by Martorano’s, but there’s been no official announcement of that Italian restaurant’s closure yet.

Inside chatter is there’s a big restaurant shake-up is coming to Paris, so gird your loins.

It’s not difficult to guess what qualities a Snoop and Martha collaboration might have. Gorgeous interior design. Excellent food (with creative entree names). Fantastic cocktails. A sense of humor. Street cred. A built-in fanbase.

What’s not to love?

It’s worth noting, Snoop Dogg has a cookbook!

Martha Stewart has said she’s impressed by Snoop’s cooking chops.

Fun fact: Martha Stewart has spent more time in jail (five months for tax evasion) than Snoop Dogg (five years probation and 800 hours community service for firearm and drugs charges).

We see so many restaurant announcements in Las Vegas, it’s easy to get jaded, but this one has us genuinely intrigued and excited to hear what’s in store.

You’ll know more when we do! Look for an official confirmation from Paris Las Vegas and Caesars Entertainment soon.

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Paris Las Vegas Confirms Vanderpump Lounge to Replace Laurel Lounge

It took a minute for Caesars Entertainment to confirm our scoop, but a new Vanderpump lounge will replace the closed Laurel Lounge at Paris Las Vegas.

The reason is fairly obvious: The Vanderpump Cocktail Garden at Caesars Palace is absolutely crushing it, so Caesars wants to make the most of that surprising success.

This seems a great fit for Paris, what with all the fancy.

We say “surprising” because the lounge that preceded the Vanderpump lounge at Caesars was Fizz. Despite having the seal of approval from Elton John (his husband David Furnish operated
the venue), the place (wait for it) fizzled out in 2017.

Fizz was gorgeous but never caught on. Try, try again.

After Fizz, the space was dubbed Cocktail Lounge. We are not making this up.

The Vanderpump Cocktail Garden, however, has taken off, and we hear it’s become one of the most financially successful, if not the most successful, lounge at any Caesars Entertainment resort in Las Vegas. No small feat.

As for the new lounge, it’s called Vanderpump à Paris. In French, an “a” with a thingy over it means “at.” Think of all the cost-savings resulting from simply eliminating an entire letter from the name! We aren’t going to use the accent mark because it’s an annoying affectation, but you do you.

We’re just happy they didn’t put “Le” in front of the name. They do that with everything at Paris. It’s wasn’t just the Village Buffet, it was Le Village Buffet. Which is closed and not coming back, by the way. “Au revoir,” Le Slightly Better Than Average Village Buffet.

Lots of changes the works at Paris. Say goodbye.

From the news release, “Vanderpump a Paris will feature delectable dishes, whimsical and unique cocktails, and a lush, elaborate atmosphere with eclectic, Parisian-inspired design details.”

Fun fact: Whimsical Cocktails was the name of our band in high school.

Lisa Vanderpump says in the news release, “After living in France for many years, it has been such an incredible journey to make our ideas a reality and, working with our extraordinary design partner Nick Alain, we have created a design unlike anything we’ve ever seen, with epic visual statements—it is our hope to bring the stunning visuals of Paris into the heart of Las Vegas. The food will be sexy and delicious, the cocktails exquisite and unique, and the overall experience will be one that is unforgettable! It’s really been a labor of love and we can’t wait to share it with you.”

On the Nick Alain front, the designer and longtime Vanderpump collaborator sort of tipped everyone off about the new lounge by sharing a photo from inside the former Laurel Lounge on Instagram. Oddly, Caesars is more upset about us spoiling their surprises than this guy. Go figure. We do that a lot. We actually shared Lisa Vanderpump was coming to Las Vegas long before (Feb. 2018) her Caesars lounge was announced (Nov. 2018). Not that everything has to be about us, probably.

We probably should’ve covered this ground sooner, but in case you don’t know who Lisa Vanderpump is, we’re right there with you. She’s a restaurateur and TV personality, mainly known for her appearances on “The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills” and “Vanderpump Rules.”

You’d be surprised how many opinions we have about things we know nothing about.

She and her husband have owned 36 restaurants, bars and clubs in L.A. and London.

The Vanderpump at Paris lounge will have about 200 seats, featuring ornate awnings, signature light fixtures and an entrance flanked with statues.

The news release says this about the cocktails, “Like Vanderpump’s other locations, the cocktail menu will feature the unique and never-before-seen.” Which we’re pretty sure means the same thing, but let’s just say we’ve tried a few of the drinks at the Caesars location and they were tasty AF.

We’re pretty sure a publicly traded can’t put “tasty AF” in its news releases.

Vanderpump at Paris will also have “light bites.”

While we were skeptical about the Vanderpump experience, the team at Caesars Palace proved us wrong, and we’ve enjoyed our visits a lot.

Before wrapping this up, we should bid a farewell to the Laurel Lounge at Paris. Cost-cutting measures at Caesars Entertainment have led to the demise of these popular VIP lounges. The free “light bites” and unlimited hooch were fun while they lasted.

There’s a lot going on at Paris, and look forward to a Snoop Dogg and Martha Stewart restaurant concept to be announced soon.

The new Vanderpump lounge at Paris Las Vegas casino opens in winter 2021.

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Vital Vegas Podcast, Ep. 128: Filling Your Orifices With Vegas Exclusives

It’s the podcast you never asked for, and plenty of it!

In this episode, we mostly talk food. There’s a virtual buffet of restaurant scoop you won’t hear anywhere else.

There’s a major restaurant shake-up happening at several Caesars Entertainment casinos, and we’ve got the first word on what’s going down. Just in case people still say “going down.”

Snoop Dogg and Martha Stewart are in at Paris, Martorano’s is out.

It was a great run!

Drew Brees is in, Toby Keith is out at Harrah’s.

A new Vanderpump lounge is in at Paris, the Laurel Lounge is out.

At Bally’s, Buca Di Beppo and Tequila Taqueria are reportedly out.

No official announcement yet, but chatter abounds.

We also touch based with Dan Coughlin, the mastermind behind the glorious brisket fried rice at Circa’s 8 East, and chatted with Manuel “Manny” De Jesús Saldaña, co-owner of the new Taqueria Ktrina at downtown’s Pawn Plaza.

Also, we circle back with Jonathan Michaels of Sightline, the company powering Resorts World’s new cashless system. We dig into how the new system is being received, what refinements are in the works and what’s next.

Cashless is the future of casinos, so better get your feet wet.

See? It’s not all drunken rambling! Some of it’s just rambling.

We dive into the new Las Vegas mask mandate (required indoors, vaccinated or unvaccinated), and provide an update on the sharp decline in table games at Caesars Entertainment casinos.

You know there’s a “Listicle of the Week” in your future as well.

It’s news. It’s views. It’s schmooze, taboos and moderate amount of booze.

So, gird your loins as we stuff your various cavities with all the things you love about Las Vegas.

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Angels & Airwaves Music Video Has Hell-Ton of Vegas

Angels & Airwaves, a musical performance group we haven’t particularly heard of before, just released a new single, “Losing My Mind.”

We like the song, but love the video, and you can probably figure out why.

The video is bursting at the seams with Las Vegas.

Finally, somebody in Las Vegas is using a crosswalk.

According to Rolling Stone, the “video features TikTok star Rampage and a callback to one of Tom DeLonge’s characters for Blink-182.” Of that phrase, we literally only understand a couple of the prepositions.

Anyway, here’s the video. We trust you will enjoy picking out all the Vegas featured by the band.

//www.youtube.com/watch?v=e95efluJ9yw

From what we can tell, the lead singer of Angels & Airwaves, Tom DeLonge, was one of the co-founders of Blink-182. They did the catchy “All the Small Things” and “What’s My Age Again,” according to a renowned music expert referred to as the Internet.

DeLonge created a character named Boomer for a Blink-182 song, “First Date,” and the new video features Disco, Boomer’s brother.

In all seriousness, though, who cares?

There’s so much Las Vegas!

The video takes “Disco” and his dancing companion to various spots on The Strip and downtown.

The pair spend a good time at the Bellagio fountains, as well as at Plaza on Main Street.

They also hang out in an alley downtown, which might seem odd, but we always thought those alleys are very cinematic.

The new Angels & Airwaves showcases our world-class dumpsters.

Hogs & Heifers also gets some time in the spotlight.

Hogs & Heifers has been through a lot recently, so glad they got a little screen time.

There’s also a stop at the downtown gateway arch outside Strat.

Any time the world Las Vegas appears in a music video, an Angels & Airwaves gets its wings.

These guys cover a lot of ground, and while we’re not sure “Rampage” can hold a candle to our very own Jabbawockeez, this is still a fun romp around Sin City.

Innumerable bands have chosen Las Vegas as a location for their videos, including recent favorites The Weekend (125 million views) and Bruno Mars (1.4 billion views), among many others.

We’re pretty sure the ultimate song shot in Vegas remains “I Still Haven’t Found What I’m Looking For” from U2. There’s just something about our alleys.

//www.youtube.com/watch?v=e3-5YC_oHjE

The more the merrier when it comes to filming in Las Vegas, no matter the musical or cinematic genre.

Just don’t close off any streets. That’s irksome, musical performance groups and filmmakers.

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Free Parking Ends at Planet Hollywood and Miracle Mile Shops

We told you paid parking at Miracle Mile Shops and Planet Hollywood was in the works nine months ago, now it’s official.

It was fun while it lasted.

The “mile” in Miracle Mile Shops refers to the distance from the parking garage to Planet Hollywood’s craps tables.

The previously free self-parking will now cost $12 (up to four hours) and $15 for 24 hours, according to the Las Vegas Sun. The first hour is free.

Parking continues to be free for Planet Hollywood hotel guests, per the hotel. Parking is free for Platinum, Diamond and Seven Star tier levels of the Caesars Rewards loyalty club.

Unlike at other Caesars Entertainment casinos in Las Vegas, locals don’t get a pass on paid parking.

We first caught wind of the change back in Oct. 2020.

Our sources are tope, which you just learned is a portmanteau of “totally” and “dope.”

We’re told Miracle Mile Shops is expected to generate about $100,000 a month in revenue from
paid parking.

Caesars Entertainment resorts have had paid parking for some time, but Miracle Mile Shops has remained free because it’s not owned by Caesars. Planet Hollywood guests have benefited.

The owners are Miller Capital Advisory and CalPERS (California Public Employees’ Retirement System), which we didn’t know until we started typing this sentence.

While it’s a bummer Miracle Mile Shops will now charge for parking, the reality is it’s tough
having a free self-park garage when everyone around you has paid parking.

Parking fees should be waved for old-timey cars and showgirls.

The list of Strip casinos with free parking has dwindled, but there are several that still have it, including Tropicana, TI, Venetian and Palazzo, Casino Royale, Circus Circus, Wynn and Encore and The Strat.

On the bright side, pretty much everywhere else in the world has paid parking. All right, we’re using the term “bright side” liberally, but you know what we mean.

Seriously, though, ask people in New York, Chicago or L.A. if they think $15 is a lot to park somewhere for 24 hours.

Still, there’s no sugar-coating it. Parking fees suck.

Don’t cry because it ended, smile because it happened.

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Word is Harrah’s is Getting a Walk-On’s Sports Bar and Restaurant

As we’ve shared exclusively, Toby Keith’s I Love This Bar & Grill has permanently closed at Harrah’s.

Now, we’re hearing what could take its place.

A few weeks back, we were told the Toby Keith spot would have a new (and very expensive) sports-themed bar and restaurant, in partnership with a well-known, retired athlete.

This just in: The athlete’s name is Drew Brees.

As-yet-unconfirmed, but the association with Drew Brees leads us to believe Harrah’s will be getting an outpost of the business he co-owns, Walk-On’s Sports Bistreaux.

Vital Vegas. Spoiling surprises since mid-2013.

Walk-On’s Sports Bistreaux is based in Baton Rouge, Louisiana. The first Walk-On’s opened in 2003.

Walk-On’s seems a great fit for Harrah’s, as it has been transitioning into a convention hotel due to its proximity to the Caesars Forum conference center.

While the former Toby Keith’s space isn’t readily accessible to Las Vegas Blvd., it’s in the perfect spot to snag ravenous conventioneers. The idea is for it to be the go-to post-meeting hangout.

Here’s a video about the company.

//www.youtube.com/watch?v=E7E3HoUOcvg

Co-owner Drew Brees, of course, is a former professional quarterback who played 20 seasons in the NFL, most of that time with the New Orleans Saints.

While Harrah’s has lost a good deal of its Mardi Gras theme, that New Orleans connection could still be a marketing hook.

There’s no timeline for when Walk-On’s might join the Harrah’s restaurant line-up, which means they’ll have time to reconsider that apostrophe that’s going to drive us nuts.

Stay tuned for more about the new sports bar and restaurant coming to Harrah’s.

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Vici REIT (Caesars Spin-Off) to Buy MGM Growth REIT (MGM Spin-Off)

In an exciting turn of events for lawyers and spreadsheet enthusiasts, Vici Properties (a real estate investment trust, or REIT) will purchase MGM Growth Properties (another REIT) in a deal valued at $17.2 billion.

What does this massive deal mean to you? Nothing, really, but it’s a slow news day, so you’re hearing about it, anyway. Sorry.

If you remember nothing else from this article, you will remember the Vici logo dry humping the MGM Growth logo.

The marginally intriguing element of this sale is Vici is an offshoot of Caesars Entertainment.  The main competitor of Caesars Entertainment is MGM Resorts. MGM Growth is affiliated with MGM Resorts.

In movie terms, this deal is a little “Pretty Woman” (for the mergers and acquisitions), a little “Deliverance” (the inbreeding) and a little “Sleeping With the Enemy” (the non-adverserial relationships between two entities that would normally be adverserial).

Look, not all analogies are perfect analogies.

In other exciting news, “Simultaneous with the closing of the transaction, Vici Properties will enter into an amended and restated triple-net master lease with MGM Resorts.”

Translation: At least three Deutsche Bank analysts are currently having to swap out their underwear.

Vici and MGM Growth own casinos (and the land beneath them), then lease them back to themselves, pretty much. It’s all so simple.

Basically, Vici owned 28 casinos, now it will own 43.

MGM Growth Properties owns Luxor, New York-New York, Delano, MGM Grand and Mandalay Bay on the Las Vegas Strip. MGM Grand and Mandalay Bay are co-owned by Blackstone (yet another REIT).

Random shout-out to Luxor’s “inclinators,” the hotel’s elevator system.

MGM Resorts will pay Vici $860 million in rent.

Vici recently purchased Venetian and Palazzo, and owns Harrah’s Las Vegas, as well as a slew of other casinos which are less interesting because they are not in Las Vegas.

The upshot is MGM Resorts doesn’t actually own very much in Las Vegas anymore, and that’s by design. They describe their strategy as “asset light.”

MGM Resorts isn’t a real estate owner and casino operator anymore, it’s an operator. With this strategy, MGM Resorts is accumulating a ton of cash, useful for paying down debt and investing in other areas of its business. Read more.

Random shout-out to people who don’t know it’s pronounced like Roosevelt’s middle name.

Simply put, MGM Resorts used to be the landlord, now it’s a tenant.

The deal is expected to close in the first half of 2022.

If you must, read the boring version of this deal in the form of the official news release.

If you’ve been paying attention, you knew 2021 was going to be a big year for mergers and acquisitions in Las Vegas.

Gird your loins, there’s more to come.

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10 Surprising Facts About Caesars Palace

Caesars Palace, arguably the most recognizable casino in the history of Las Vegas, opened August 5, 1966.

In honor of the resort’s 55th birthday, we’ve slapped together some trivia items we find fascinating. Then again, we find “Blansky’s Beauties” fascinating, despite it being one of the worst spin-offs, ever, but that is neither here nor there.

//www.youtube.com/watch?v=8VVIPvxmweU

1. Caesars Palace was built with mob money.

Caesars Palace was founded in 1966 by Jay Sarno and Stanley Mallin. Sarno was a colorful character with a big appetite, you might say. To fulfill his big vision for Caesars, Sarno and Mallin got a $10.6 million loan from the Teamsters Union pension fund, sometimes referred to as “the mob’s bank.” The mob’s money was courtesy of none other than union boss Jimmy Hoffa, who did not respond to our requests for comment.

There’s only one Caesars Palace, which provides further proof writing photo captions is challenging.

2. The opening of Caesars Palace was over-the-top.

The three-day grand opening party for Caesars Palace cost $1 million. The 1,800 invited guests consumed more than two tons of filet mignon, about 50,000 glasses of Champagne and 30,000 fresh eggs. The party also featured the largest order of Ukranian caviar ever placed.

If you haven’t taken this photo at some point, you’re not Vegas enough.

3. One of Jay Sarno’s big ideas involved piranhas.

At one point, Jay Sarno wanted to put piranhas into the pool at the hotel’s Bacchanal Room restaurant. There, he intended to lower a suckling pig into the pool to be devoured by the fish, presumably to entertain guests. The Health Department nixed the idea, thankfully. “Thankfully” for the pigs, anyway. The piranhas were sort of bummed.

4. Caesars Palace almost became a Denny’s.

We are not making this up. In 1969, there was talk of Denny’s Restaurants acquiring Caesars Palace. Investors were described as “enthusiastic” about the purchase, but the deal never happened. A Hollywood-based broker said, “Denny’s was taking too big a risk getting into casino operations, in contrast to its forte in food service.”

5. The fun stopped when Jay Sarno “allegedly” bribed IRS agents.

Jay Sarno got into some hot water when he bribed two IRS agents for $75,000 to provide some assistance with a pending tax audit. At the time, it was the biggest bribe in the agency’s history. Sarno was eventually acquitted (although he freely admitted attempting to bribe the IRS agents) with the help of a familiar name: Oscar Goodman. Goodman would later become the mayor of Las Vegas.

6. There’s no apostrophe in Caesars Palace.

No self-respecting list of trivia about Caesars Palace would be complete without mentioning the fact there’s no apostrophe in “Caesars.” That’s because Jay Sarno believed the resort should be for everyone, not just Caesar. Fun fact within a list of fun facts: There’s a bar at Caesars called Apostrophe Bar. Now, you know why.

Now you know. Unless you already knew. Then, then you knew.

7. Trevi Restaurant is nowhere near the resort’s Trevi fountain replica.

Trevi Italian Restaurant, inside the Forum Shops at Caesars Palace, sits next to a beautiful fountain, but it’s not the Trevi fountain. Trevi restauant sits next to the Fountain of the Gods, depicting Neptune, Pegasus, Diana, Jupiter, Mars, Venus and Uranus. It actually doesn’t portray Uranus, but we are 12. The Trevi fountain replica actually sits outside the Forum Shops, and it is considered superior to the original because it’s closer to blackjack tables.

Trevi means “three roads.” Try as you might, you’re going to learn something today.

8. Caesars Palace was named after Julius Caesar, which is awkward.

Not to be a buzzkill, but Caesar was, in the parlance of historians, “sort of a dick.” Caesar committed genocide, for starters. His soldiers killed a million people (including about 200,000 in a single day) and enslaved another million during the Gallic Wars. You don’t see that aspect of Caesar in the resort’s advertising for some reason.

Chill on the genocide, yo. You’re a resort spokesperson.

9. Caesars Palace has a shrine outside.

Caesars Palace has lots of wondrous things, but among its most peculiar is a Brahma shrine. The “four-faced” Brahma shrine was donated to Caesars Palace in 1984, and is a replica of a popular shrine in Thailand. Another bonus “fun” fact, which we intentionally put in quotation marks: In Thai culture, women are encouraged to avoid visiting the Brahma shrine during menstruation, as it’s considered disrespectful. Seriously.

Shout-out to all our readers in Lumphini Subdistrict, Pathum Wan District.

10. The most-painted objects at Caesars Palace are Cleopatra’s breasts.

Caesars Palace has a slew of items guests rub for good luck, including two protuberances that get most of the attention: Cleopatra’s breasts. Cleopatra’s Barge was recently shuttered, but the barge, and Cleopatra’s lucky charms, remain in place for now.

Cleopatra is always happy to see you.

Check out our list of Las Vegas things you can rub for good luck.

Chafing. It’s a thing.

We trust our list of fun Caesars Palace facts has filled your head with useless knowledge to help you win bar bets and further your sexual conquests. Mostly that second thing.

Caesars Palace remains an icon of the Las Vegas Strip, and 55 is the new 40, so keep on being epic, Caesars.

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Laughlin Casino Paid Las Vegas TV Stations to Change the Weather

It can get hot in certain parts of Nevada during the summer, which is easily the biggest understatement since someone first uttered the phrase, “Liquor, it’s good.”

One of the wildest Vegas-related stories we’ve ever heard (and we’ve shared some wild Vegas-related stories) has to do with the weather in Laughlin, also known as “a less interesting version of Las Vegas,” and several Las Vegas news stations.

We didn’t believe it at first, now we do, so gird your loins.

We have it on the very best authority that in the early 1990s, at least one well-known Laughlin casino paid Las Vegas TV stations to report a temperature lower than it actually was in Laughlin to keep potential visitors from baulking at the extreme heat.

Doppler, schmoppler. Money talks in Las Vegas.

We won’t name the casino, but we will say it is located on the side of a river (the Colorado), in Laughlin, Nevada. If you can’t figure it out from that hint, watch for a drunk Tweet at some point.

According to a source with intimate knowledge of the arrangement, three of the four main Las Vegas TV stations agreed to take part in the scheme. The fourth station wasn’t part of the deal, mainly because it didn’t have a big enough audience to warrant the expense.

Each Las Vegas TV station received a payment of $3,500 (or about $7,500 in today dollars) and its weatherpersons reported the temperature as 10 degrees cooler than the real temperature in Laughlin.

The theory was this lower temperature would draw Sin City residents looking for a respite from the sometimes (all right, often) unbearable Las Vegas heat.

The mind reels.

The City of Las Vegas did a coloring book. We did our version.

There’s an old saying from Charles Dudley Warner (it’s often misattributed to Mark Twain): “Everyone complains about the weather, but nobody does anything about it.”

Well, Laughlin actually did something about it.

It’s unknown when the practice ended, and we don’t know if any other Laughlin casinos struck similar deals with Las Vegas news outlets.

Part funny, part alarming, if nothing else, this story is illustrative of the influence casinos, and money, have in Las Vegas. Yet another contenter for biggest understatement of all time, by the way.

Laughlin is about 100 miles south of Las Vegas, which makes it cooler because it’s farther from the Sun. Reminder: We are a blog, not a meteoroligist.

Weather plays a key part in hotel demand, of course. January is typically the slowest month in Las Vegas, due to the chill. Summer months are slower as well, as temperatures often rise above 100-degrees: In June, the average is 102 degrees; July, 107 degrees; August, 104 degrees.

You can tell when summer arrives because local news stations start baking cookies on car dashboards. It’s sort of a thing.

Due to our subtropical (we used to be in marketing) weather, we strongly advise you stay indoors during your visit. This way, you can take advantage of modern air conditioning technology as well as staying hydrated with your favorite spiced rum.

The post Laughlin Casino Paid Las Vegas TV Stations to Change the Weather appeared first on Vital Vegas.